Caught in the Crossfire
Posted by Intuition Girl
Are you part of the “Sandwich Generation“? This particular age group (ranging between 40 to 60) often finds themselves caring for both an 
aging parent and a child (and sometimes grandchildren, too). It is not that humans are not capable of multitasking and caring for those they love; but all too often, we as adults become caught in the crossfire of what Associate Medical Editor of the Mayo Clinic, Edward T. Creagan, M.D. refers to as the “perfect storm”. If you are one of these individuals, you know exactly to what he is referring. You are struggling with your own emotional, physical, mental and spiritual needs whilst at the same time trying to fill your immediate family’s individual needs as well as caring for your aging parents. It can become quite the task just waking in the morning to take your drive to work while all this chaos is happening in your life. Whew! By day’s end, you are ready to pack a suit case and run away to some deserted island. You are not alone.
Maybe the senior in your life depends entirely upon you, but there are ways to help alleviate some of the stress that being a “sandwich” child brings. Between work, the kids, (and the grandkids), your spouse, your household, and your parent(s), you may feel like you are simply running around in circles with no end in sight. The first step to relieving stress is to eliminate those items on your list that are unnecessary for you to do. For instance, if you are taking on extra projects at work that are not required of you, perhaps you need to pull back the reins on those. Or if you are the only one doing the family shopping, perhaps you can have your adult children pick up grocery items needed in the household.
What are you doing for you? Remember, it is important to care for yourself first. If you are caring for everyone else and not tending to your personal needs, you will find yourself in a world of hurt. When you are a sandwich child, you tend to neglect your physical issues, emotional stresses, and other relationship challenges. If you feel like you are carrying the weight of the world upon your shoulders, then you must make it a point to give yourself some “me-time”. It is not selfish to take time for yourself to get a massage or simply curl up on the sofa with a good book. Meditation or deep-breathing exercises would be helpful as well helping you to center yourself and regain lost balance in your life.
Additionally, there is some positive news. Now may be the time to research senior co-housing. Today, more and more independent seniors are turning to one another to meet each others’ needs. One case that is becoming a strong trend in these United States is that of co-housing like “real-life Golden Girls“, Nancy McPhaul and Nancy Fairbanks out of Saratoga Springs, NY. As aging adults still choose to be independent, many are like Ms. McPhaul and Ms. Fairbanks, who have elected to share expenses and enjoying each other’s company in the same home. It saves money and enables each to help one another without the physical assistance of their adult children or grandchildren. This would be an admirable and cost-effective opportunity to help mom or dad still maintain independence without making them feel unwanted or uncared for. I know it is a challenging situation, but if you involve your parent in the decision-making of these options, it will help alleviate both yours and his (or her) stresses and fears.
There are also senior home service centers that will pitch in to assist when you cannot. They offer transportation, medicine reminders, assisted living services, and so much more. The nice aspect of these service providers is that you can acquire their help as often or as little as necessary. Remember, you are not abandoning your parents, you are helping them.
In the end, you need to create time for yourself so that you can begin living a joy-filled life and still love and care for those around you without running yourself down in the act of doing so.
Joan Marie – your Intuition Girl
© Caught in the Crossfire – 2013
By Joan Marie the Gift, Intuition Girl
Mission Impossible
Posted by Intuition Girl
Do you feel like every time you turn around, you are facing mission impossible? Nothing you do seems to work out the way you want it. You appear to be running in circles and you keep having the same situations come up in your life. Does that sound like you? Maybe the proverbial “lit fuse” is you. Perhaps you have become your worst own enemy.
Whether you realize it or not, your actions, behaviors and perception may be hindering your progress in life. When your daily routine becomes mission impossible, you need to rethink and recreate your current lifestyle. “But I don’t do anything differently than other people,” you say? Well, let’s take a look at where you are and the issues you are encountering:
- Is your loved one making you feel miserable?
- Do you see yourself in a dead-end job?
- Are you a hoarder, holding onto way too much clutter in your home?
- Are you afraid to move forward with your goals?
- Are you still trying to live in the past?
- Have you lost track of who you are?
If you answered yes to any of the above questions, then you might just be creating your own mission impossible in life. In order to become whole and happy, you must focus on what is attainable and what makes you feel truly alive. If your relationships with work, your significant other, your health or your friendships are putting a strain on your emotional, mental or physical wellbeing then it is time to reshape your perception on what is working and what is not. If you, yourself, are experiencing emotional barriers that prevent you from being happy and healthy, then you must discover what those emotional blockages are so that you can face them, release them and head them off at the pass.
Your missions in life do not have to become fearful and tedious. Only you have the innate control to overcome any misconceptions or trepidation that you may have in achieving success and true happiness. There is an old affirmation that many individuals use to help maneuver life’s sometimes murky trails:
“Please grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.”
Should you ever feel like your life has taken you on seemingly impossible missions, I want you to stop whatever it is you are doing and take a long, deep breath. Say the affirmation above and lose yourself to the Universal flow of energy. All things will be revealed to you when you are ready to receive them. Once you have, your impossible mission will transform into the blessings and opportunities that you have been missing all along.
Until we speak again, I am
Joan Marie, Your Intuition Girl
© Mission Impossible – 2012
By Joan Marie the Gift, Intuition Girl
Are you interested in becoming your own Master Intuitive? Joan Marie has an upcoming 5-Month Intuitive Life Coaching Program beginning January 16, 2013. Call the office (941) – 954-9001 to speak with Joan Marie to see if this program is right for you!
